How to make sex more comfortable in a relationship

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One of the assignments I often give couples I work with is to explore different ways of being physically intimate together.

Not just new positions—but new experiences of connection in their bodies.

And what I’ve found is that many couples want to expand their sex life… but feel limited by their bodies.

I mean…can you really get your legs all the way up in the air and not feel it in your hips the next morning?

And when sex isn’t comfortable, it’s a lot harder to want it.

Let’s be real:

Beds were designed  for sleep, not necessarily for great sex.

So sometimes, instead of trying to force your body into positions that don’t work, it’s worth looking at the environment you’re in.

I’ve found that a “yoga chair” (also known as a Tantra Chaise), which happens to be beautiful and functional for its named use, is my favorite spot for sex!

Why?

The advantages are many!

I bought mine to fit my size. I’m small, so I prefer a narrow chair.  If you’re bigger, you might like a wider one.

I prefer the narrow chair because it allows me to straddle my partner easily without my legs being tucked under me like they would be on the bed.

Also it’s a great position for oral  sex.

So many of us have achy hips or bad knees, or an injury-prone back.  Using a yoga chair helps ease your body into a comfortable position.

The Liberator is a company that first started marketing these chairs as sex chairs.  Here’s one of their chairs.  It’s a higher price point, but I like that their website offers inspiration!  If you scroll to the middle of the page you can see suggested positions to try when using the chair.

Whichever you choose, the chairs are both stylish and (very sexily) functional.

What’s important to understand, though, is that while something like a yoga chair can make sex more comfortable and accessible… it doesn’t create connection on its own.

I’ve worked with many couples who have all the “right” tools—and still feel disconnected when it comes to intimacy.

Because what actually makes sex feel good isn’t just the position or the setup—it’s how connected, safe, and present you feel with each other.

I talk more about what gets in the way of that here

Some of the benefits of using one:

Some of the chairs have hard points on them already or an attachment you can add on.   But if yours doesn’t, it’s not hard to attach them so that you can use the chair for restraints or bondage play.

The chair is great for making all sorts of sexual positions and play easier and more comfortable, including both penetrative sex and oral sex.

The vegan leather covering feels nice on skin and wipes clean easily. (A major plus in my book…less laundry!!)

It’s a special, sexy piece of furniture that will make you think about sex whenever you see it.  And where we put our attention, energy flows!

While sex furniture can support comfort and exploration, many couples discover that deeper, lasting change happens when they address emotional safety, desire, and connection together—.

Wishing you a sexy week,

xoxo

Xanet